PodcastDirectory.com's listings of the Hello, and Welcome to the Internet! Podcasts

Episode 54: The End of the Internet (And I Feel Hawtt)

With the end of the 00's, the boys reflect on the decade that has past in terms of great achievements in Music, Film and Television by sharing with you, our loyal listeners our definitive "Best of the Decade" lists. While this may sound boring as all shit (and might be to some), the different tastes of your hosts sparks some great discussion and some very unexpected choices are made. We have a special guest in the studio, Tom Stuart, who compiles his list on the fly, and although being a h ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

This is basically a test episode to see who the fuck is still out there. Also the very first Jono + Metcalf duet show, which, as one can imagine, leads to alot of rants and no-hold-barred silliness. Good news: We discovered the pop rocks problem, looks like our usb soundcard has gone bust, so this show was recorded using the imac onboard mic, and it sounds pretty good. Thanks Apple Corp!

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

For this long awaited episode the boys had promised you a few famous guests. Did they deliver? Yes. Anthony, Branko and Jonathan graced the studio, hot from their tour of greater Howick after their article fame. However, the Artisan GUns, busy with an Australian tour to prepare for, couldn't be here. This doesn't mean there was nothing to talk about though. Among other things, they talk about their dash with fame in the Eastern Courier (and the controversy which followed!), the All Whites ( ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

Long time HAWTTI friend Dylan Marshall was always going to appear on the show but this particular appearence came earlier than expected for one simple reason. Dylan (Mr. Dylligence) is a rapper. On this very special debut show he lays down a few unique, raw rhymes (including a choice hawtti intro). He goes into depth about the craft, his newly formed crew and shares some well road-tested shower tips. This sounds like a joke, but it isn't, Mr. Dylligence is exceptional.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

In this episode, their second ever live show, the boys are joined by longtime friend Stacey Brummer. She's up from Wellington so they have many questions about film productions she's working on and what the men are like there (strange, apparently). They also talk about Fashion Week faux pas, drunken bets and respond to comments from "HAWTTI: Girlfriends (coming Summer 2009)" member Katy Bond. We apologise for the missing part at the beginning, I guess you shoulda listened live, jerks.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

It may have taken over two years but the boys have finally made it to fifty episodes! What have they done to celebrate this especially monmentous event? Well...nothing really. But we had a deal, and you guys broke it (we didn't get cakes). This was also the first HAWTTI episode to be broadcast live on our server and also on the Moshbox 106.7fm station (this offended some people, we're not sorry). What did we cover this week? New movies, parties, throwing pancakes in Dennys and the ever deve ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

It's a non-stop gab fest this week as the boys are joined by a...uh... girl for the first time in two(ish) years. This does not mean that they were on their best behaviour though, far from it. Jessica Prebble is very game and discusses everything from celebrities (yes including MJ) to sex and people we know. The show flows well, and Jess gives even Branko a run for his money, which is great.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

What an asshole. How dare he not like Michael Mann. I for one love Michael mann. The plots, the digital video, he's unstoppable. Romance was kinda shitty but that's to be expected from such a great man. Hey fuck you if you hate Michael Mann, I love him. He's hyper-stylised, MTV and DEFINITELY not shallow. He's done Last of the Mohicans, you got, Thief, Collateral (oh man!), The Insider (his best movie!). One of my favourite directors, for sure. Oh and fuck Branko and his opinion about Depp. ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

The boys sound very good in this one. It's the holidays and they've almost made it to 50 shows. Jesus, they must have a deal with someone high up to get this far. Topics touched upon include yet another Loveable Loser episode, the very successful HAWTTI hosted gig at the King's Arms, fat jerkoffs at concerts, friends offending friends and Transformers raking in the cash. Important note: yes MJ does get a mention, we had to but it's very, very brief.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

We can promise that this is the most raw and honest episode yet. Much of this is due to the guest, Sean Winchester, who promised to tell the whole truth about everything. If you're offended by anything said, go fuck yourself. Topics touched upon include: the most attractive girls at Macleans, Jono sending too many emails without getting results, the Mother of all energy drinks, a punchup in a bathroom and a goal in 25 seconds, among other things. Pearce was too scared to attend but hopefull ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

Today we bring you not only one but TWO very special guests into the studio for somewhat of a reunion episode. Touted as one of the longest episodes in HAWTTI history (by us) this may almost be worth the time we made you wait for it. Among the topics discussed are: The Artisan Guns name change, some recent fan mail, the first HAWTTI event, Jono's standup debut, great burgers, faux facebooks, beautiful girls on the bus, Branko's monday from hell, and much much more!

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

Joined in the studio by a very special guest we've been trying to source for weeks, the boys churn out a fantastic show with full bore discussion from beginning to end. From recent concert reports (the Who, Coldplay) to discussions on the rights and wrong of internet piracy, the show takes a more serious turn than you might be used to. We stand up for our mate Barack Obama, Metcalf gets owned about his"Screamo"knowledge, some sweet shit on YouTube AND some fantastic television shows.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

In an alternate 2009 New Zealand, HAWTTIers are part of the fabric of everyday society, and the "Doomsday Clock" - which charts Morgans' tension with Branko - is permanently set at five minutes to midnight. When one of his former colleagues is murdered, the washed-up but no less determined masked vigilante Pearce sets out to uncover a plot to kill and discredit all past and present podcasters, and therefore isn't there (again). As he reconnects with his former crime-fighting legion - a ragt ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

After a very characteristic break, the boys are back in the studio with a bottle full of booze and a barrel full of tales to tell. We've been very busy over the last few weeks, and since Metcalf has a girlfriend, he doesn't care about anyone else because he's a faggot like that. We discuss many parties that have occurred, THE WATCHMEN MOVIE, some shitty movie called Gran Torino, We also cover performance nerves, Christian Bale's latest blowout and how Chris brown likes to beat chicks. A Tou ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

After a lengthy holiday break (which was sweet) the boys bring you our first ever DOUBLE EPISODE to make up for the lack of shows recently. This episode contains both our holiday reports, tales of woe, dirty cheating bitches AND our Big Day Out Report 2009. A real cracker of a show, hope you guys had a good holiday. PEARCE.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

With a ream of concert tales and party debauchery to divulge, this episode is well and truly stuffed with content. We recap further events from the Christchurch trip, the new Bond film, Shitcalf's band playing on Bfm, and how he is the biggest asshole when he is throwing up everywhere. We're happy to have Branko back in the studio cause really, it isn't a HAWTTI episode if he isn't there.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

With the weighty task of living up to last years HAWTTI Christmas Extravaganza, the boys were anxious. But on the night (day) of recording, brimming full of enthusiasm we went straight into it, with neither a list or an idea in sight. With an very special (and somewhat unexpected) guest showing up in the studio (actually) we discuss the ridiculous holiday retail hours we've been working, classic christmas anthems, our plan for christmas day and new years and much much more. Listen in for a ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

This episode is a double HAWTTI first - not only is it our very first (and probably last) episode in the sunny city of Christchurch, we also have our first actual celebrity guest on our show. That's right, THE Elliot Smith, prolific singer/songwriter (with such albums as X/O, Figure 8 and and Either/Or) is back from the dead for this very special HAWTTI episode. We discuss fame, fortune, and his battle with lifelong depression. The boy's offer Smith their opinions on their favourite Smith ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

With this episode, the boys step down from the mantle and cement their place in podcast history's Razzie Awards. Years from now this episode will be hailed for destroying what little audience HAWTTI have left. Discussion ranges from Halloween parties, to the international and local elections, to really fat chicks and why we don't like them. There is even a throwback to previous episodes, that have sucked as bad as this one (Episode 2). The impotance of this monumental work cannot be underes ...

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website

With this episode, the boys step up to the mantle and cement their place in podcast history. Years from now this episode will be hailed for rejuvenating the tired podcast format. Discussion ranges from halloween, to the zoo, to current events involving retail stores. There is even a throwback to previous episodes, with a shocking conclusion to Metcalf's much talked-about bidding-saga. The importance of this monumental work cannot be underestimated. Yeah, really good.

Listen | Listen in your iPhone | Download | View full cache | Visit Website